unravelling

Enduring the pain of gaining nothing after giving all that I have is absolutely a joke right, truly is a joke. I am experiencing this now, the process seem stuck but it actually continuously improving without i knew it. It has been 8 months since I started day trading in Forex and commodity market and I would like to say that I have gained positive and negative process. These two negative and positive stages are common in any aspect of life and I have to get through it and face it like a man. I could not escape or skip this part since I won’t be as strong as I want to be in future. There is a beautiful quote by G. Michael Hopf saying that

“Hard times create strong men,
Strong men create good times,
Good times create weak men,
Weak men create hard times.”

After I read this quote, I feel like that I am in safe zone where everything is going to turn to be okay and I don’t feel in urgent to shape my future, I often feel I dont have to worry about tomorrow and the thing that i will be doing. Like seriously this is not good sign since I will mostly rely on a miracle that will happen to my life. The day I realize this, I started new thing which is Forex and Gold Day trading. It seem not the smartest move but there is a lot worst thing out there compare to day trading. On top of that, there is a better thing as well beside day trading but I do not seek those good things and I choose this trading industry as part of my life from the moment I started until I write this passage.

I passed the stage of beginner’s luck where I just clicked buy/sell and profit, I was so happy on that day and thinking that I could escape my job and earning a lot of money. My thought was already wild that everyday I would count for this amount, that amount ohhh god like a daydreaming everyday. Then the reality started where all my entries were hitting stop loss and here we go, the hard times come. Remember that quote above “Hard times create strong men” I am in hard times now and I dont like it at all, to be honest that nobody does not like hard times I guess but I have to get through it. The harder time it gets, the more I feel the challenge and the more desire to take it down and conquer it. Im hungry now for this time, I will enjoy every corner of it like every single details of it.

Have read through the Internet that a profitable trader will start earning consistently by year two or three, for the first year of trading they say like shit and it was really difficult to be a profitable in the year one. Look right now I’m in the first year of destroying journey. It’s not even a year yet. It’s has been eight months and this month specially on June 2026. I lost about US$600, it’s not a lot of a amount but the mistake that I committed on the first week of June resulted this loss. I thought that all the process that I’ve been doing didn’t really show anything since I still do a revenge trading, do not calculate the risk properly and do not know when to enter or out. I don’t see any PNL turn into a green but all of them are red, in this process I think that I’m a failure but if I think it that way there is a chance that I will give it up and do not continue this journey. I would not absolutely do that since I’m not that person’s who can give it up easily, I will try, give my best and do all the things that I need to be done to be a successful trader one day.

Most people might quit during this period of time where they do not see any green PNL or the amount of loss is way too big. I will not quit that easily. I will fight to the end and not gonna lie to you what’s gonna happen during this process. It does look like I do not go anywhere, I won couple of trades and then I blow it all the profit that I have generated before due to like a discipline and didn’t follow the rules. At this stage I’m really good now following the rules, risk only 1% per trade, do not greedy, follow the market, and execute properly. These are the process for me in order to execute the Trade. You might find one day.